Ken sat in his small apartment, having not yet had time since getting out
of grad school to find a real one.  Suddenly there was a knock on the door.
He lifted the poster covering the eyehole, and looked out.

    At this point, few FFML members would be surprised at who was there.  A
teenage martial artist in a red Chinese shirt and black pants stood.  Ken
greeted him.  "Hi, Ranma.  I was expecting you."

    "Expecting you?"

    "Yeah, you know.  It's only happened to about thirty other people.  Before
you try anything funny, I'd like to remind you that I can make characters
act like I want in my own stories."

    "No, you can't.  You have to keep the facts and characterization
consistent.  I know you try to write like that, and I can use that to my
advantage.  Now, I believe I was here to _help_ you."

    "But I don't _need_ any help!"

    Ranma threw a bucket of water at Ken.  "Hey, wait, Saotome-san.  You
can't do that!  If you could just get buckets of Jyusenkyou water, you'd have
been decursed by now, right?"

    "In 'Rendezvous with Ranma', I'm at Jyusenkyou.  I could have picked up
some water then."

    "But I didn't write that yet!  Besides, if that's how you got the water,
you'd also be pregnant."

    "WHY DO YOU THINK I'M UPSET?"

    The water, motionlessly suspended in the air while its consistency was
debated, falls directly on Ken.

    "Wait, Ranma!  Hey, water, stop, I'm not finished.  Ranma, what about the
Futaba/Ranma crossover?  Nothing bad's going to happen to you there."

    "I didn't even get any appearances in it.  That was a Nabiki story.  Tell
me, how much did she pay you to write a story around her?"

    "You got a few brief mentions.  And since when does Nabiki pay anyone
anything?"

    "Brief mentions aren't enough!"

    "But you'll get a bigger part in future episodes.  Hey, how come none of
the other revengefic characters complain about how many lines they get?"

    "Ask them!"

    "But you're Ranma.  You're one of them.  Wait...  how come future episodes
don't count here and they did for Rendezvous with Ranma?  And there must be an
infinite number of characters who don't get any lines in my fics.  It's
great to have one or two then!"  Ken rummages around in a pile of paper.
"Here.  Here's printouts of Fight of our Life.  Writing fanfic around Ranma
wasn't even _chic_ back then."

    At this point someone else storms in, swinging aside the door hard
enough to tear it off its hinges.  She seems to be a blonde.

    "Uhhh...  hello, Mizue...."

    "What's the big idea making me stuck in female form in those Grit posts?"

    "Hey, at least you're doing something.  Would you rather be stuck in
limbo since 1989?  You can say you're older than everyone else in the Grit!"

    The next person to enter is in a reverse-colored Senshi uniform.  She has
white hair.  "Uh, hello, Kameko-chan.  This is a really small apartment room,
you know....  By the way, are you here to do good or to help me?"

    "I _really_ don't like the ending of Sailor Moon Future #7...."

    "I didn't write that one yet!  What's all this with fics that I haven't
written?"

    Ranma, reading over the papers, says "So write them."

    "Look, would you rather I write fics and horrible things happen to you,
or rather I not write them at all?"

    Ranma prepares to Tenshin Amaguriken Ken's computer.  "You forgot one of
the choices.  Write them not-horrible-like."

    "I can't do that.  Stories aren't stories without conflict.  And if you
win, someone else is going to lose, and then they'll be in here threatening
to destroy everything and drop magic water on me.  Uhh, would you mind leaving
my computer alone?  It was a lot of trouble getting it working."

    "No, they won't.  Revengefic season will be over by then.  And we'll see
about the computer."

    This ends with Kameko going "Bio...  sphere!"  Ranma gets caught in a blue
bubble, and pops out of existence.  "Guess you were here to do good after all.
After all, you wouldn't even exist without me.  Thanks, Kameko."  At this
point, the water splashed down on Ken, and Kameko let off a big laugh."

    "Eek, I'm beautiful!"  Ken nosebleeds taking inventory of her body.
"Wait, why are you laughing?"

    As Kameko walked out, visible behind her was Nabiki, handing her a
printout of the location of all the monsters in Tokyo as payment.  "Good job,
Kameko.  Can you believe the nerve of that guy, having me date a sex-changer?
And I'd never feed Akane's food to Ryouga, or eat pizza with corn on it...."

    At this point, the Power Rangers arrived.  "Okay, I _know_ I didn't do
anything to you guys."

    "Oh, you have it all wrong, miss.  We know you're big fans of ours the
way you wrote those Sailor Moon crossovers, so we've decided to make you watch
all four seasons of our shows...."